#164: “Team Lappin Vs The Mongoose”

Yesterday afternoon, I played my first online session since returning from Barcelona, grinding some SNGs for a small profit. Yesterday evening, I loaded up a 3x Turbo session (Super-Tuesday means a particularly large number of those on the schedule) intermixed with some Turbo MTTS. This proved to be a particularly profitable few hours and my plan was to continue the session on into the wee hours by registering for 20-30 MTTs. That was until my flatmate insisted on watching ‘The Rose of Tralee’.

An hour in and I couldn’t bear it any longer. The awkward conversations. The stories with no point. The jokes with no punchlines. It was worse than playing live poker. So I decided to play some live poker. Daragh ‘The Mongoose’ Davey was in the Fitz, playing a €50 Double Chance so I legged it down, late regged, busted quickly and hopped in the cash game. Daragh joined my table after he busted (sitting to my immediate left) and proceeded to pwn me in two spots. In the first, he successfully got two streets of value with AJ on a AA2-7-3 board versus my 88 but it was the second that showed he has some sick reading skills. I straddled to €5 and from UTG, Daragh made it €16. I defended with a spannery 93s and the flop came Q64 and it went check-check. The turn came an 8 and it again went check-check. The river was a 5. Believing that Daragh either had a hand like AK/AJ/A10 but also that he was capable of calling with such a hand, I thought the smart bet was to merge my range with a bet of $18 into $35. This would be the type of bet that could represent third pair or better. Daragh thought about it, scanned me up and down and called with 22. It was a small pot sure but that was still a pretty dirty read.

We moved tables and I rallied, winning the next two confrontations. He raised to €11 preflop and I called with Q9. I donked €2 on a 10-8-3 board with 2 diamonds and he made it €12. I counted out a raise to €24 but then opted for the call. The turn was a black Ace and I complained out loud about how that was a terrible card for my range. I checked and Daragh checked behind. The river came a black 9 and I checked. Daragh bet €30 and I tanked for a bit, deconstructing the hand out loud. I thought Daragh would bet 2 pair on the turn. I also thought he would raise more on the flop with air or a big Ace hand. That lead me to believe he either had a draw (diamonds, JQ, J9 or 97) or a 10x hand (K10, Q10, J10, 109). I ruled out JQ, believing he would bet that on the turn and I figured he would just check back J10 and Q10. So, in my mind, I was behind K10, 910 and an Ax of diamonds hand where the x is a small card but I was beating J9, 97 and all the other busted flush draws. I then briefly second-guessed my belief that Daragh’s flop-raise sizing meant he couldn’t hand AK/AQ, remembering that my €2 donk bet may have had a wonky effect on his bet sizing. I sighed and cry-called and was delighted when Daragh showed me the 64 of diamonds.

A few hands later, Daragh raised the straddle to €16 and was called by the Button and me in the small blind. The flop came As-5s-2c, I checked and it went check-check. The turn came another 5 and I checked, Daragh bet €27, the Button folded and I made it €78. After some deliberation, Daragh made the call. The river came a red 6 and I bombed it for €200. He took his time before making the fold. I mucked without showing and texted him ‘GF’ which he believed was a level.

We moved tables again and Daragh immediately got into a hand with an old geezer. Limped around multi-way, the flop was AA2. Everyone checked. The turn came the 5 of clubs, bringing a third club. Daragh bet €12 and the geezer called. The river came a red 9, Daragh checked and the geezer potted it for €35. Daragh’s brow furrowed and he made the call with K5. The old geezer showed him A2 for the flopped nuts and Daragh grimaced. It was at this moment that I told him that he had just been pwned by LAPPIN. I smiled at him as he looked at me confused.

“Let me introduce you to someone – Peter, this is my friend Daragh. Daragh, this is my uncle Peter”.

I cannot accurately describe my joy at watching Daragh’s face transform into one of shock and horror. With his eyes out on sticks and his mouth open, he looked like a Mongoose in the headlights – “Your what?”

“My uncle”, I replied unable to stop laughing, “You just got pwned by Team Lappin.”